Thursday, October 14, 2004

Turning the Smirk Upside Down

In order to stomach watching a third debate I had to arrange an internet chat with my friend Kris in Minnesota. We turned the debate into a drinking game. Both of us had to take a drink whenver we heard:

1. A lie from Bush
2. A reference to the Clinton administration
3. A knockout blow from Kerry

Needless to say, typing messages was kind of a challenge toward the end so we switched to cell phones for the post-debate wrap-up.

Knowing how I was processing the debate, you are not likely to put much stock in my judgement of who won it, so I'll keep that opinion to myself. Here, however, are some of our observations:

-Neither of the candidates took the question about the effect of the women in their lives seriously, though Kerry talking about his mother was really sweet.

-"Furious George" was a no-show. Kind of made me sad, but then again his absence kept me from feeling as poisoned after this debate as I had after the others (of course Old Forester gets some credit for that).

-There is a new super hero on the Hill. His name is "Budget Man." Bush spot-lights a big "B" into the sky over DC when he needs him.

-Kerry quoted scripture three times in appropriate ways to great effect. Bush didn't--at all. I wonder if Bush knew when Kerry was quoting scripture.

-Bush's sarcastic jokes, which can sometimes play well over the air, fell with the thud of Texas hailstones last night. They were flat because this last debate was naturally a little more serious in tone since this was the final opportunity the public would have to form opinions about a shared experience with these guys.

-Bush's smile is biggest and his eyes the blinkiest when he is lying or about to lie.

-Bush: "Kerry is way out of the mainstream" Translation: "Don't vote for Kerry, he's differnt." This Bush strategy will back fire, since most of the U.S. is aware that currently the "mainstream" is an uncontrolled torrent of confusion, oppression, and chaos pouring from the Oval office.

-Kerry is patient.

FLIP-FLOP alert:

Okay, I changed my mind about saying who won the debate. Even a half-drunk man could tell that Kerry is by far the better debater, and he was much more presidential in his demeanor and ability to grasp complex facts and put them together.

For my Republican friends out there, it is okay to vote for Kerry. In this election, who could blame you, not Bill O'Reilly, not Richard Lugar , not John McCain. And frankly, since as my friend Rosie says "once you are in that booth, no one really knows who you vote for", I'm not sure they won't vote for Kerry in the end. The reality is that Bush is not very Republican--he's too fiscally wasteful and too invested in your personal life issues to deserve that label.


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